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Showering for a Living, What a Grind!
Heavy Duty TurboScrub
By Daryn Guarino




Time to break out the Heavy Duty TurboScrub (10.5oz bottle for $18.00). This industrial strength body scrub is "designed to give dull surfaces extra shine."

Heavy Duty TurboScrub I sniffed the bottle and discovered that they had made this product smell like the powdered industrial soap you might find in a mechanic's washroom plus a hefty dose of peppermint.

Walnut shells, apricot shells, pumice, and titanium dioxide cut into my skin like heavy grit sandpaper. I could feel my rough edges and bumps being ground down to smoothness by this abrasive mix.

I can personally attest that the exfoliating action of this scrub is, indeed, industrial strength. I tell you that I scrubbed off birthmarks, tattoos, and mosquito bites with this super-powered grinding paste (okay, I'm slightly exaggerating). 

So there I was, happily giving my body a good once over with this sandpaper in a jug, when the peppermint oil, orange oil, and ascorbic acid start seeping into the billions of tiny scratches I had just made. I heard someone screaming and eventually realized that the screamer was me!

Yeeeeeeeeeeeeeeouch!A burning had set in wherever my skin was less than rugged (even worse were my "exit only" zones!). That is to say that the backs of my arms, my elbows, and my knees were nicely softened, but the rest of my body was wracked with minty pain. Yeeeeeeeeeeeeeeouch!

I hopped around the shower and muttered obscenities as I tried to rinse the agony away from certain areas. Finally, my manly nature took over and I regained my composure. I wept quietly for several minutes until the flames subsided.


TurboScrub is the most aggressive body scrub I have ever used! From the grinding components to the acid follow up, this scrub will make short work of anyone's rough skin.

I recommend this product as the solution to your rough skin problem, hoo boy. It's a great product for the price, but only apply where needed (and pay attention to where the runoff goes).



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